Often the excessive love and care of parents lead to the fact that they inadvertently push their child to subconsciously choose the role of victim. And then, already in adulthood, these same children constantly complain about life circumstances and people around them, can not build healthy relationships, and in any situation are looking for an excuse to suffer.
We have collected 7 tips to help you raise a happy child with healthy self-esteem and a sober attitude to life.
1. Teach your child to deal with unpleasant emotions
Children who know how to control their emotions are better able to cope with difficult situations and make the right decisions. But no child is born with these qualities. The task of parents is to teach the child to cope with such unpleasant feelings as fear, anxiety, anger, and sadness. It is normal to feel a different range of emotions, but it is important to deal with them in socially acceptable ways.
Help your child understand that unpleasant emotions cannot be used as an excuse for wrong behavior. Explain to the child that our mood should not depend on external factors.
Everyone needs an individual approach, but the scheme is the same everywhere: at any manifestation of unpleasant emotions in a child, occupy her with something that she loves, that calms her, and in 5 minutes your child will not remember that some time ago he was been offended or sad.
2. Teach your child to solve problems on their own
There will always be problems, and the sooner you teach your child to deal with them, he will be more successful and happy. When a child lacks these skills, she may spend all her time avoiding problems instead of focusing on solving them. Other children, on the other hand, begin to act without realizing their choice.
The task of parents is to give the child a clear formula for solving problems. But in no case do you not solve the problem of your children. Instead, help your child formulate the problem on their own and suggest ways to solve it, let him choose the best one, and try it out.
3. Teach your child to help others
It is very important from an early age to instill in children kindness and compassion for others. But it is not enough to explain to the child that you need to help others. It is important to show this by your own example because children are known to learn by imitating their parents.
Show your child that all people face difficulties. And then it will be easier to cope with their own problems.
4. Allow your child to make a mistake
We often hear: “A child needs to be programmed to succeed from an early age!”, “The sooner he begins to learn languages, the better he will be able to master them”. The list goes on and on. At the same time, all loving parents consider it their primary duty to protect their children from failures and mistakes. As a result, we are blocking the same path to success.
Each time you tie your child’s laces or solve other problems instead, you deprive them of a valuable lesson.
Give your children more freedom, let them make mistakes. The sooner you learn to appreciate the positive aspects of difficulties and allow children to benefit from the consequences of failure, the faster you will be able to enjoy your child’s success.
5. Do not protect the child from negativity
Our world consists of good and evil. And no matter how hard we try to protect children from the latter, sooner or later they will face injustice.
Instead of constantly hiding unpleasant situations from him, try to tell him about them in ways that are appropriate for her age and emotional state.
6. Do not make the child the center of the universe
If you build your life so that everything revolves around your child, you run the risk of raising a great egoist who is convinced that everyone should cater about him.
Instead, teach your child to focus on what he or she has to offer the world, not on what he or she can benefit from.
7. Strengthen the child’s sense of self-worth and develop self-confidence
Self-esteem is a person’s idea of the importance of his own personality. The main thing you can do to develop healthy self-esteem in a child is just to love her. Show him as often as possible how much he is dear to you for no reason.
When a child does something you don’t like, don’t just criticize him or her, explain what he or she could do instead.
Do not criticize or ridicule the child in the presence of other people. This can leave an indelible mark on the psyche, and the child will never be able to repel people who will offend her, and such people certainly will.
Do not compare the child with other children, especially brothers and sisters. Every child in your family is an individual, with its strengths and weaknesses.
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